You're completely useless in the revolution.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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