Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Randomize
