I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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