she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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