babies were throwing up all over the place
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
We left the knife in your bed.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
