im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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