Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
