Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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