My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I got inside last night via doggy door
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
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