Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
The Olympian is in my bed
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
