I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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