So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Randomize
