Apparently you make a good broom.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
Randomize
