i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
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