Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
mondays should just be called national damage control day
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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