Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Randomize
