He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Randomize
