I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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