If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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