Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
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