I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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