The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
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