she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I supernannyed him into submission
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
