But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
birth control should be required to get into college
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
