Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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