I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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