Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
