he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Randomize
