Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
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