You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
