I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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