It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
