Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Randomize
