how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
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