Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
