Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
