if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
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