Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
