sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
