Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Threesome in a minivan. New low
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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