I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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