I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
