I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Randomize
