I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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