Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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