And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
