Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize