You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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