Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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