Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
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