I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
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